autism

A photographic memory is not found in all diagnosed individuals but for those who do have it it is pretty amazing. I remember before my son was diagnosed he could recite the alphabet backwards just as easily as he did forward. Temple Grandin wrote a book called Thinking in Pictures in which she describes her brain like a computer and when somebody asks her a question she retrieves the information and can see it in her head. Lately they have been talking about people with these amazing memories in the media and they have determined a connection to obsessive compulsive disorder. As my son matured he has lost some of these mind capabilities not sure why but some people retain them through life.

Caught the tail end of The View today and needless to say they were talking about the increase in autism diagnosis-es. I can’t remember the doctor’s name but I remember seeing her on Good Morning America. She was pushing her new book about Myths in Medicine. One interesting tidbit I caught is that she said they were finding that most families are now touched by autism in some way or another. Relatives are thinking back to Uncle Whatever and remembering odd behaviors that they might have done which are now recognized for being autistic behaviors. So here is my question; Is it more prevalent now or did it just go undiagnosed? Because of all the methods to treat fertility and technology giving us more accurate advise on when to conceive, more babies are being born. Is that what is increasing the incidence? I wonder.

Most parents with diagnosed children can peg an autistic kid from miles away. Although each child can be completely different there is a commonality among the population that is recognizable to the trained eye. What I find interesting is the autistic tendencies that I recognize in adults. Because the diagnosis was not so common thirty years ago there is a large portion of undiagnosed adults.  It is sad for them because they have had to deal with many of their issues alone.  It appears that there are more adults being diagnosed along the spectrum later in life.   From what I have read it is a relieved feeling that they experience when they realize that there was a reason why they never really got the typical aspects of behavior.

Wow. I am completely impressed. Some women just amaze me how they are able to keep it all together and be so busy. To be honest I can’t see the point in lifting 200+ pounds over your head, but what ever she does she seems fulfilled and looks great. Her son appears to be high functioning, he was really cute. I heard the “look at me” prompt so I am assuming she has a behavior program together. I wish her the best of luck.

Potty training tends to come late for our kids.  That is one of the reasons diaper companies are making larger pull-ups.  While it is imperative that you do work with them to be potty trained, you must feel it out to determine when they are ready.  It is another element that is delayed in their development but it will come in time.  Training is done through a reward system given in increments depending on what your particular kid can be bribed with.  Food is never a good incentive.  You do not want them to reward themselves with food when they are adults and when you have to go to the bathroom you are not always hungry.  For those kids that are terrified of loosing the pull-ups try cutting holes in the areas that need to be exposed for elimination.  Once you see them start to go run them to the potty and let them go through the pull ups.  Once they realize that it isn’t really harming them it will go much easier.  Just remember to keep your wits about you because this can be a hard hurdle.

When my child was in kindergarten his teacher initiated something that she referred to as “buy day” The kids were forced to buy a platter of her choosing and eat their age in bites of each item. At first I was thrilled because I thought it would introduce my child to new foods, but after weeks of possibly being forced to eat 6 peas every Wednesday he began to throw up at the thought of buy day. I think the kid knew after three tries that apple sauce wasn’t his thing. Not everybody has the same taste buds. What one person thinks is great another might just not like and that is ok. The teacher and I went to battle over this program. The program was eliminated after it was said and done and I ended up really liking this teacher but we just didn’t agree on that one issue.

My son does enjoy a wide array of foods. He know what he likes and he knows what he doesn’t like and now that it is almost ten years later he still doesn’t like applesauce.

Taking care of a child with special needs can be exhausting both mentally and physically. If you allow yourself to burn out you won’t be good to anybody. The best thing you can do for your child is to take care of yourself. Time constraints are tough, we are all trying to cram in everything and adhere to everyone’s schedule. Me time is a must and needs to be put in that schedule. It is definitely harder to do when your kids are young and you can look forward to more me time as your kids age. But for now make it one of your priorities because your sanity at this point is a must Don’t be afraid to ask someone for help just because you have a diagnosed child does not make you wonder woman. (or superman).

Many times you will here an autistic child talking to themselves.   Sometimes they go over situations that occurred during the day.  It can be pretty amazing to listen to.  I have observed entire conversations.  I think self talk is ok because it is their way of reviewing what has gone on in a way that they can make sense of it all.  Sometimes they will recite words to a movie or tv show (exactly).  This is more of a perseveration and while it is a tool they might use for self calming it is one of those things that can make them look weird to their peers.  Don’t be to freaked out if they are doing this at a young age because most of the kids I have been in contact with have out grown this.  You can use prompts like no more movie talk.  If they are doing this behavior in school you might want to ask their teacher if they can have a stim chair or a place that they can go to where they can do their self talk in private as to not disturb the other students in the class room.

I was speaking with a friend who was feeling bad for her autistic son while watching him outside fishing alone. She was brainstorming how to find him a buddy to fish with. He comes home from school every day drops his books grabs his rod and fishing equipment and out he goes. He is very into fishing. She expressed her concerns to her son’s therapist who turned and asked the boy if he would prefer to fish with a friend, with out hesitation the boy said no.

Our kids do not necessarily need or want a buddy. They can be happy alone and that is ok. Don’t mourn for them over what you feel they should want. While we do want them to be comfortable in social situations not all situations need to be social. Enjoying your own company is not something that everyone is capable of so be happy for them that they do.

Just because your child has special needs does not give them a free pass for bad behavior.  Disciplining any child  can be challenging but with our children it definitely requires some strategic thought and planning.  Screaming and yelling will not produce positive results.  Plus we don’t want our children screaming and yelling when they are not happy with a situation.  My son’s kindergarten teacher came up with a system which she referred to as The Privilege List.  It is a concrete way to teach your child that good things are taken away when they display bad behaviors.  Of course this does not refer to self-stims or behaviors beyond their control.  You actually write down a list of activities that they enjoy doing.  Computers, video games, t.v. ect.  Of course some of the things our kids enjoy might be off the beaten track but make sure to include them. Sit down and explain to your child that when they engage in bad behavior they will lose a privilege for the remainder of that day.  If they continue behaving badly more can be taken away. You just simply take out the list and cross off the privilege Never take them away in the same order and make sure that you follow through and not give back the privilege that was taken or they will not get the point.  A warning can be used before you resort to the list but don’t keep warning with out following through.  I am not saying that this is easy or will work right away for every behavior but it is a concrete way for your children to learn that they can not behave badly.